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The six stages of a Nepali family video call

The connection. Video on both ends. Neither camera is pointing at a face. The volume negotiation. “Can you hear me?” is said four times, twice by each side, always simultaneously. The tour. The phone is walked around a room so that you may look at furniture. The roll call. Everyone in the house is fetched, […]

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‘Hajur’ is four different words wearing one coat

If you learn one Nepali word, learn this one. It is not a word so much as a setting. As “you”. The respectful second person. Using timi where hajur was expected is the single fastest way to be thought rude by someone who will never tell you. As “yes?” Someone calls your name from another […]

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Nepali directions never contain a street name. They contain a landmark that was demolished in 2018.

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Eleven things in every Nepali household drawer

Not the useful drawer. The other one. A torch, working, with no batteries in it. Batteries, of an incompatible size. Three screwdrivers, all of them flathead. Keys to a padlock that no longer exists. A sewing kit from a hotel in Pokhara. One chopstick. Warranty cards, sorted by nothing, for appliances long since sold. A […]

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Every Nepali household owns exactly one pair of scissors, and it lives in a different room each week.

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Nepali time is not late. Everyone else is simply early.

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The most load-bearing word in Nepali is ‘hunchha’. It means yes, no, maybe, and I stopped listening.

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No Nepali mother has ever accepted ‘I already ate’ as a final answer.

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Every Nepali family has one drawer holding a torch, three screwdrivers, and the warranty card for a television sold in 2009.

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Kathmandu has two seasons, and both of them end up on your shoes.